Two years later while still working at the Catholic school, a student passed out in the gym as lunch was
ending. She was laying on the ground not moving and unresponsive. The principal was standing at the
door and did nothing. No call to 911. It was a big trigger for me.
At that moment I realized I had handled the suicide for my family, but not for myself. It was going to
be a hard road, but I would get through it. This led to me taking a day off from work. When I returned to
work the next day the principal asked me how I was feeling. I said fine, I just needed a mental health day.
She kind of looked at me. So I said I'm not sure if you know, but two years ago I witnessed a suicide. I
handled it for everyone else. Now I'm handling it for myself. Her jaw dropped. She couldn't handle
what I had told her. At that moment I knew I had made a mistake. I shouldn't have said anything and kept
everything to myself. From that day forward she treated me differently. She checked on my classroom
everyday. It really upset me. In addition to telling the principal, I had also opened up to and trusted a
coworker who ended up stabbing me in the back. Ultimately, it ended with me not being offered a
contract for the following year. I had never done anything wrong to those kids despite what I was going
through. With the way she handled it, I didn't even get the chance to say goodbye to my students. At that
point I was still on just antidepressants with no formal diagnosis.
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